Monday, October 17, 2011

Empty

Our house is too quiet, too still.  Our family is too small.  With just the three of us, it's too lonely.

Even though I know how much he loved her, it amazes me and touches me and hurts me to see Brad grieve so hard for Raina.  It hasn't even been 3 days but it feels like 3 seconds and 3 lifetimes all at once.

Where is the clicking of the paws on the hardwood?  Where is my shadow who follows me out to the garage when I do the laundry?  Where is the little black blur who rushes to the kitchen every time I drop a crumb of food?

We miss her is such an understatement.  There is an empty hole in our hearts, our home, our lives where she once was.  She's been with me/us since before Brad and I were married.  She's moved with us 3 times,  she's seen us fight, she's seen our happy times, all of our milestones.  She was waiting to greet Katie the day she came home from the hospital.  She was part of our engagement pictures.  In every family photo, in every Christmas card.  She was a huge part of our every day.

I know a lot of people would think we are ridiculous for mourning the loss of a dog so bitterly.  To be so heartbroken at the loss of an animal.  But can you really call a creature "just" an animal when she's THAT much a part of your family, your life, your history?

We love you so much Raina.  We hope you know what a wonderful, sweet dog you were and how much better you made our lives.


3 comments:

  1. Layne, I am so, so sorry. I just read this post and the previous one and I am crying for you and your loss. I have two pups of my own and I know how they are part of your family, they are your baby before you had a baby. I am so sorry. I can't even imagine the pain and loss you are feeling right now. I am so sorry.

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  2. Oh this had me tearing up...I totally understand the heartbreak losing a pet causes. They are really like our children and they give us so much unconditional love. I wrote an article called "Allie and Me" about the dog that literally helped me get through my diabetes diagnosis...they are furry little angels for sure. When she passed I was devastated. Love your beautiful pic of you guys and your cute Raina. (((Hugs)) to you all.

    P.S. My mom got me a book called "Dog Heaven" when my Allie passed, you might want to check it out...it's a children's book, but it was beautifully written and illustrated and it gave me some comfort. So sorry for your loss.

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  3. omg honestly....I can't even take it. I think one of the hardest things I dealt with was Peanut peaking around the corner and looking for Cailey every morning because she was her favorite puppy. It broke my heart and broke me down to tears every single day until Peanut thankfully forgot.

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