Tuesday, August 3, 2010

This is depressing. . .

Let me start by saying that I'm not one of those women who ever understood why pregnant women insist that they are or look fat. I don't get it. It is so obvious that pregnant women are PREGNANT and not FAT. Those two things look completely different. I figured it was just hard for women to grow out of their clothes and (later on) swell in various places and that it just was overall hard to be that much bigger than you are used to being. So they called themselves fat.

But I couldn't WAIT to look pregnant. First, I'm not the thinnest girl on the planet and to finally have an excuse NOT to suck in my belly sounded glorious. And second, I think pregnant women are the cutest thing ever!

But! I was not prepared for this. For the first 7 or 8 weeks or so, I battled with some serious bloat. I definitely didn't look pregnant but my jeans were pretty snug and I knew it was more bowel than baby. Still, not much different than a period would be so I didn't really worry about it. Then around week 12 or 13, Brad and I both started to notice a change. Hooray! The first signs of a tiny baby belly. But I knew it was too small for anyone but me and him to notice. Me, because it's my body. And him, well, because he's my husband and he knows my body pretty well. ;-) Sorry, TMI.

But by week 14 or 15, I thought for sure people would start noticing. I even stopped sucking in because I was sure it was obvious that my new-found belly was all baby! (Am I the only girl out there who makes sure to always be "sucking in" a little just to make sure that any potential muffin-top or tummy roll remains at bay??) And I was sure those close to me, who were used to seeing me pretty regularly, could tell. I was sure they'd notice the change and say something. But no, nothing. I was a little disappointed because I was so excited to think that I might be showing! I made the mistake of telling Brad this. And then he made the mistake of being "helpful." Thinking that it would be genius to quietly ask friends and family if they could tell. He did this thinking, bless his heart, that they just weren't paying attention. That maybe if he pointed it out they would finally notice.

Instead, I have had 3 people tell me that I, in fact, DO NOT look pregnant. My own mother even asked today if I had gained any weight yet. Wha?!?

Why is this depressing, you ask? Because I've outgrown my pre-pregnancy jeans (well, I suppose I can button them but it ain't pretty!) Because my tops no longer reach down quite as far as they used to. And because I definitely have a noticeable pooch. And why do they all think this is how I normally look?!?

Yes, it is seriously depressing that everyone thinks this is my normal. And to answer my mother's question, NO! I haven't gained weight. In fact, I lost 5 pounds in the first trimester and have only gained 1 pound back! Proving that this pooch, here? It's all baby!

So I leave it up to you to judge. Please be kind. But, also, be honest. Here goes nuthin':
This is from back in January. I had just started the pump and would be going off birth control in a couple of weeks! Little did I know, I would be pregnant within 3 months!
Here, I was 7 weeks pregnant. Holy bloat, Batman! My waist? She's a-gone.
And this was today, at 15 weeks and 4 days. For the love of everything that is good and holy, how is this not a change?!?

So, for me, I will be so stinking happy when this belly finally comes into it's own. When it enters a building before I do. When it is so ridiculously obvious that I'm pregnant, that not to notice would mean you are in serious need of corrective lenses. Then, and only then, will I stop whining that I look fat. ::sigh::

Crankily yours,
~Layne

11 comments:

  1. Looks pregnant to me. But - if you've ever once (and I never have) asked someone when the baby is due only to find out they're NOT pregnant, then it's understandable that people might not say anything for now.
    You look fabulous!

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  2. There is definitely change! Congratulations :)

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  3. i can definitely see a difference - you look pregnant in the most recent pic, for sure! i wasn't one that was anxious to look pregnant (although i know most women are) so for me, i was happy to not show that soon...but i understand your frustration :)

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  4. What a cute baby bump! I could totally tell......it's all baby!!

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  5. Yes, you look pregnant. And I'm sure people are telling you you DON'T look pregnant because they think that will make you feel better.

    I'm totally holding you to the promise that you won't be complaining when your belly is enormous. :)

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  6. You are all so nice! I suppose it's just that this in-between stage is so strange.

    Jacquie - I SWEAR I won't complain about a giant belly!! Promise. I might kvetch that I'm uncomfortable but I figure at a certain point that's allowed! ;-)

    Colleen - As a general rule, I don't ask a woman about a pregnancy unless I know for sure she's pregnant or I see the baby coming out! It's just not worth it if I'm wrong! But I should have been more clear. I totally don't expect strangers to approach me and commment or people I don't know well. I was just suprised my close friends and family (who know I'm pregnant) couldn't see a change. . . . maybe I should show them this post!

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  7. It most definitely looks like a baby belly. I don't understand how they could not notice a change.

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  8. Definitely see the change and the baby bump!! I think sometimes people who are around you frequently may not see the change because to them it's happened gradually - each time they see you just a little more. Just wait, that will be how it is as your child grows...you'll look back at photos and go, wow, they've grown so much the last few months but you didn't really see it because you are with them every day. Make sense?

    Well, we need to get together this month! I'm sure I'll notice your baby bump since I haven't seen you in a few months. Also, I'm sad to say, I'm moving to Nashville, TN...plans at this point are to move Labor Day weekend. So, I would love to grab lunch before I leave. Let me know what your schedule looks like.

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  9. Christi! NO!! You're my only diabetes friend nearby! :-( It was so nice to have you so close and to know you were there for advice with the pump, CGM, pregnancy, etc.

    We'll definitely do lunch before you leave . . . But I'll miss you!

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  10. I can definitely see the baby bump and it is so cute :) I think when people see you everyday the change is less noticeable!

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  11. i'm with you on this. one you def look different from the pics and you def look all baby now. two i also can't wait to be all belly where there's no way to avoid the fact that i'm def preggo! :-)

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