Monday, November 16, 2009

Tired and Alone

I've been having the worst time sleeping lately. I lay in bed at night and stare at the ceiling and every now and then I'd look at the clock. Last night it went something like this:

Went to bed around 10:45 pm
Looked at the clock at 11:11 pm
Looked at the clock at 11:51 pm
Looked at the clock at 12:45 am (Am I asleep yet??)
Looked at the clock at 1:36 am
Looked at the clock at 2:46 am (Seriously, self, go to sleep!!)
Woke up at 6:10 am

As the time spaced farther out I probably wafted in and out of sleep a little but overall I was awake most of that time until after 2am. And then I worked a 12.5 hour shift. Seriously, I'm pooped! This is not the first time in the last couple of weeks I have done this either! I can recall at least 2 other times in the last 2 weeks that I have just not been able to get to sleep. Last night I had a little bit of a reason, though.

Brad left today for Austin, TX for business. I kissed him goodbye this morning when I left for work. And he got on a plane with his boss around 3pm. I really don't like when we have to travel separately. Especially when it involves airplanes. I'm not too afraid to fly but it makes me nervous enough that I don't really enjoy myself in the air. And I really don't like him flying without me. So I was a little on edge last night and today at work until around 6pm when he texted to let me know that he had arrived safely.

I'm sure I will worry again on Wednesday until I get to pick him up at the airport. I know it seems silly because it's only 2 and a half days but I really miss him and the house feels so empty without him. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have Raina to keep me company. At least I'm working tomorrow too so it won't feel all that lonely during the day.

Geez, I'm such a wuss.

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